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Sam Bankman-Fried Sells "Convicts Only" Dating App For $2.3B While in Prison 🦹♂️
"Hobbies that people love on our app are very different..."
Jul 22
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
9
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Sam Bankman-Fried Sells "Convicts Only" Dating App For $2.3B While in Prison 🦹♂️
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4
Substack Pays Users to Doomscroll With "Substack Miles" 💎
"If my wife finds out how many miles I’ve been scrolling I’m doomed!"
Jul 15
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
22
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Substack Pays Users to Doomscroll With "Substack Miles" 💎
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Nerds are Autistic In New DSM 6 🤓
"Patients will be grilled by a group of teenage girls."
Jul 8
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
22
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Nerds are Autistic In New DSM 6 🤓
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The Chicago Bulls Draft Cash Considerations 🤑
"Gamblers and the NBA owners love Cash."
Jul 2
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
10
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The Chicago Bulls Draft Cash Considerations 🤑
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6
June 2025
Allen Iverson (AI) Confused but Grateful for Insane Surge on Social Media 🔥
"Elon Musk and Sam Altman are my biggest fans!" -Allen Iverson
Jun 24
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
11
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Allen Iverson (AI) Confused but Grateful for Insane Surge on Social Media 🔥
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1
Travis Kelce Stares in General Geographic Coordinate of Taylor Swift!!! 👀
"There was a very loud sound that almost sounded like a sports car..."
Jun 17
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
10
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Travis Kelce Stares in General Geographic Coordinate of Taylor Swift!!! 👀
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1
The REAL 12 Books That are Dating Red Flags!
"I’ve seen more red flags than a Chinese military parade..."
Jun 10
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
20
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The REAL 12 Books That are Dating Red Flags!
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8
Spotify: Best we can do is shuffle 5 artists at a time. 💀
“society has made many advancements…but…”
Jun 3
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
14
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Spotify: Best we can do is shuffle 5 artists at a time. 💀
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5
May 2025
Eurovision is Paving the Way for Real Life Hunger Games
"These are the only things separating Europeans from a dystopian nightmare."
May 27
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
12
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Eurovision is Paving the Way for Real Life Hunger Games
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1
New Narnia Movie Has Edmund BETRAY HIS FAMILY For a Klondike Bar? 🤨
“I would betray my family to NOT eat a Turkish delight.”
May 20
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
9
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New Narnia Movie Has Edmund BETRAY HIS FAMILY For a Klondike Bar? 🤨
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2
Young Women are Being MISTAKEN AS HOMELESS AT AIRPORTS! ✈️
"She made a feral snarl and tried to bite my hand!"
May 13
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
26
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Young Women are Being MISTAKEN AS HOMELESS AT AIRPORTS! ✈️
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6
Jon Scheyer leaves coaching Duke TO BE THE CEO OF APPLE??? 💡
"Opponents have caught up to them in terms of turtlenecks, glasses, and jeans."
May 6
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
16
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Jon Scheyer leaves coaching Duke TO BE THE CEO OF APPLE??? 💡
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9
April 2025
Social stars' growth halts after POSTING ABOUT POLITICS Last 7 Months??? 🤡
"50% of our audience just disappeared overnight."
Apr 29
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
17
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Social stars' growth halts after POSTING ABOUT POLITICS Last 7 Months??? 🤡
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5
Cadbury's GMO Easter Bunny produces 5X MORE CHOCOLATE EGGS!!! 😱
"Gone is the wimpy lil Easter Bunny."
Apr 22
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
15
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Cadbury's GMO Easter Bunny produces 5X MORE CHOCOLATE EGGS!!! 😱
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3
NCAA Fires Writing Staff After Poor March Madness TV Ratings
"Two common TV mistakes: Duke Ex Machina and Gratuitous Fouls"
Apr 15
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
and
👟Mike Schuster👟
14
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NCAA Fires Writing Staff After Poor March Madness TV Ratings
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1
October Rewind Drat, Drat and Double Drat
Dastardly and Muttley - This week, the Dynamic Duo of Dastardly Deeds
Published on Animated
•
Apr 11
Jiazzmynne Mattdysonne Smith Promoted To CEO at Age of 23
"We also considered Macksamileon Su’ullyvann Reagan, Raeygunn xXX1337n00b5l@y3rXXx Sullivan..."
Apr 8
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
17
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Jiazzmynne Mattdysonne Smith Promoted To CEO at Age of 23
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12
"I always dreamed of getting divorced." -Celebrity Living Her Dream 🍷
"I can’t imagine any scenario that would be better than this."
Apr 1
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
17
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"I always dreamed of getting divorced." -Celebrity Living Her Dream 🍷
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March 2025
Substack 101: How to Substack Esoterically and Mimetically
"achieve organic growth without pesticides"
Mar 25
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
27
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Substack 101: How to Substack Esoterically and Mimetically
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12
Extreme Weight Loss Diet Called "The Flu" is Going Viral
People are getting heated over this!
Mar 18
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
22
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Extreme Weight Loss Diet Called "The Flu" is Going Viral
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8
“Fashion Isn’t Dead!" Says Naked Celebrity at Oscars
The latest fashion movement many call Ironique
Mar 11
12
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“Fashion Isn’t Dead!" Says Naked Celebrity at Oscars
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2
Prepare For Cereal Cinematic Universes Summer of 2025
Part of a wholesome viewing diet
Mar 4
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
15
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Prepare For Cereal Cinematic Universes Summer of 2025
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3
New Paid Subscriber Benefits and Limited $0.98/Month Sale!!!
Phase 2.0 is being implemented!
Mar 3
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
3
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New Paid Subscriber Benefits and Limited $0.98/Month Sale!!!
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February 2025
Philippines Popularize ANOTHER Weapon of War/Children's Toy
No matter how you cut it!
Feb 25
•
⚡Thalia The Comedy Muse⚡
13
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Philippines Popularize ANOTHER Weapon of War/Children's Toy
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