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Hello! It’s me, Thalia The Comedy Muse! Here are my official 2024 God Tier® picks for Halloween costumes that are guaranteed to stun your friends.
(Every costume has been officially certified as God Tier® by the Olympic God Tier Evaluators and Accrediting Members OGTEAM. Enjoy!)
The Scariest Halloween Costume
If you really want to scare the kids, the P Diddy is guaranteed to succeed! Watch the kids take off like Justin Bieber’s career in 2009! Heck you might get some adults to pass out!
The Cheapest Costume
Repurpose your Logan Paul costume…
into a Zuckerberg.
Never thought I’d ever say that before!!! Zuck’s new rebrand might include a new face! This is what he looked like before.
Am I the only one who thinks this? Either way I’m sure tooooons of people have Logan Paul costumes stashed away! Just repurpose it! The only thing is, make sure you wear your Meta Quest VR glasses so people don’t confuse the two. (Just kidding.)
The Easiest Costume
Be a Stanley cup girlie! Just get yourself one of these and you’re set! Benefits include a beverage container that is fireproof, bulletproof, and blocks Superman’s X-ray vision! (Just beware of possible lead poisoning.)
Checkout this article to see what I mean.
The Most Exotic Costume
Alright! (In Steve Irwin voice:) Here’s what we’re gonna do. First you get some green janitor clothes and put these suckers on. Then you gotta breakdance at an Olympic level. You might be thinking to yourself, “I’m not an Olympic athlete!” Trust me on this. They have really, really lowered the standards. Now, you’re gonna go out there and flail your arms like a newt in heat. With any luck, locals will start chuckin’ candy at you to make you stop.
(Inspiration. 👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻)
Then if you see a guy with an gator costume, you’re gonna sneak up right behind him… AND GRAB HIM!!!
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****I’ll restack the best “Restack with a note” I see!
Raygun won the costume contest last night— and deserved it.
I have the Stanley Cup Girlie one down but might face the wrath of the women in my house if I steal their cups.