Stanley Unveils Military Armor Line

Our boys will make it home safe!

After two insane displays of ruggedness by Stanley mugs recently the military has signed a deal with Stanley to convert their mug technology to battlefield armor.

One mug deflected a bullet and saved the life of a woman. The other survived a car fire and IT STILL HAD ICE IN IT!!!

We asked a General to comment on the deal:

“We at the military have been outclassed by 20 year old women for too long! It’s time we got some of this technology for ourselves! I pity those who dare provoke us.” -Max Kilingmacheen (5 Star General)

Here are some pictures of design prototypes that we found:

Soldier Forest Body Armor

Tank Forest Armor

Rest easy tonight mothers. Your boys are coming home safe!!!