40,000 Michigan Fans Accused of Illegally Filming Championship
They can't keep getting away with this
According to our sources Washington is accusing the University of Michigan of filming their sidelines with 40,000 strategically placed fans during the CFP Championship Monday. Michigan was accused of breaking NCAA rules earlier this season by video taping sidelines and deciphering plays.
Washington states:
“We at Washington are deeply troubled by what we found Tuesday. Transgressions that would make Ron Meyer blush. 40,000 Michigan fans, all with their cell phones out. We can only assume that they were stealing our top secret plays.
It’s a very delicate situation. All it takes is one person out of the 40,000+ people that attend college football games every week to completely ruin an offense by video taping the plays shown on the sidelines. If only there was some way to relay plays in this electronic age that couldn’t be intercepted by one fan with a cell phone. Alas, these are problems that can only be solved in the future.
Upon further investigation we have also discovered they even have film crews with professional reporters. They asked Coach DeBoer prying questions before the game and during halftime. One of them was even stationed on the sidelines at all times, pestering him while he’s trying to coach about injuries, people’s feelings, and how he’s losing by so much.”
We at Thalia’s hope that college football immediately punishes Michigan. The NCAA is known for it’s integrity nationwide and has a reputation to keep. We would also like to offer our condolences to FSU for missing the College Football Playoffs despite going undefeated.
Here’s the evidence presented by Washington:
They all look pretty guilty. Especially the guy in the Grover outfit.
40,000 plants. We don’t want to be the guy who counted.
Professional spies.
This guy is shamelessly happy for what he’s doing.
They were still filming even after the win.
There you have it folks. Literally god-tier comedy at Thalia’s.